YAHOO!
by Jonathan Chisdes
Voyage to a foreign shore
but Gulliver learned not of them
instead the world did he abhor
all the Yahoos condemn
some horses would exterminate us all
there's value in this proposal modest
loss of life our morality appall
but behavior to keep is oddest
sanctity of life, immortality absurd
these are questions I address
I read and read these classics superb
put my head in the clouds and digress
but what use is all this thinking
Laputans are not practical
can I keep an island from sinking
defend with action tactical
can I even get myself a job
pay the lousy rent
who will hire a poetical snob
or 18th century gent
be a cashier at the convenience store
fry the burgers in grease
is this what I've been educated for
to bring the world to peace?
hey mister, buy this junk
so my employer can get rich
tonight I'll get sick and drunk
settle into my niche
or I could do it on my own
start a business so worthy
all I need is a little loan
show them I am nervy
but if the customer is always right
soon I'll go bankrupt
and the only way to avoid that fright
is to become corrupt
catch-22, familiar refrain
damned either way
like a standard political campaign
can't win if fair you play
so out of necessary political condition
office seekers have to be crass
in order to maintain their elected position
these Yahoos must kiss ass
cheating and lying perfected to art
politics, power, and money
actions show they have no heart
justice, integrity are funny
maintain dominance, send in the troops
serve the cumbersome institution
don't worry, the people are dupes
intelligence is Lilliputian
in the movies, principles come first
and everyone says "how nice,
our leaders for the public good thirst"
re-elect is Hollywood's advice
but that's more of a fairy land
than the horses who don't exist
yet Yahoos are real, you understand
in decadence we persist
the more time goes by, the more we smell
the future gets worse and worse
in the 21st century we'll be unable to tell
the sacred from the perverse
values are gone and all that matters
is massive profits for corporations
the once-stable urn now shatters
fractured images are mind invasions
in reaction, to hold on to something stable
a few turn to fundamentalist religion
but that's so inflexible it's not able
to co-exist here even a smidgeon
irrationality of a zealous preacher
the ground begins to ebb
the Yahoo is a deplorable creature
though a good index to the Web
how it orders and finds it way
through a maze of hypertext pressure
but that's not where we live today
our world's like a sketch of Escher
his illusions are distorted and tangled
turn upside down and confuse
the values I was born with are so mangled
I don't even know what I lose
all I can do is take my final exam
for a moment find sense in the past
graduate now, 'cause God know I am
unprepared for the future at last!
Yahooooo!
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